lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
The bar has bullet holes in the ceiling, and the country singer had been playing drunken weezer covers. A man just bought me a beer on the grounds that I 'have his back' in a fist fight with a stranger texan. And, yes, the bartender is wearing a sherif's badge
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
Randomize
