she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
new hobby: convincing random sorority girls around campus that we hooked up last weekend. i'm 2 for 5.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
