so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
