Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Just found puke on my backpack while sitting in class. It's like this weekend won't leave me alone.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
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