Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
I've been rehabbing my soul with cheese and wine lately
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Randomize
