Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
The fact that I bookended my summer with pregnancy scares doesn't upset me. The fact that he's a trombone major does...
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