I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I told him he was a man of science and that he should conduct experiments on my tits to see how they stay up. I need you to hold onto my larynx when I'm drunk.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
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