we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
do you think they make "congratulations unfit mother" greeting cards?
or abortion recommendation cards.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
