I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
