BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Aren't you proud to know somebody who texts you "manifold facade" while dumping frozen colada mix into a blender of rum
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
