Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I wish i could 80s montage me losing weight
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
Randomize
