I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
