Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Look, I'm just saying... paying ur respects to the neighbors who had a death in the family with food u steal from the neighbors having the cookout may result in a negative karma situation.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
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