naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Good god, my descendants are going to be fucked.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I just want him to get into an accident where he's horribly disfigured but otherwise fine so he's not so freaking handsome
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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