You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
