I was in the bathroom and her cat just looked at my penis with a profound hatred.
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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