her vagina looked like bernie madoff
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
I woke up and found that i was using my computer as a pillow. i had 53 pages of random letters on Microsoft word
Randomize
