I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
He literally chugged a bottle of wine in under 2 minutes. Stood up, said "fuck what ya heard" and stabbed the bottle into their drywall.
how do you not remember that?! you winked at the bouncer and then proceeded to grind on him while chugging a beer. i don't know if i should be proud or embarrassed to be your friend
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize