Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
It's like being the dunk pilot of a plane full of pornstars and drunkenness.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
so this hot guy who looks like brad pitt circa troy era in my physics lab is staring at me right now and it's taking all the willpower I have not to procreate with him right now.
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