i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
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