Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
