Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
how much do you want to bet that her wedding invites will be vera bradley themed? loser has to frame theirs.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
Not a problem, sailor. I speak both autocorrect and typo.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
