Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
the fat guy in me is very excited, and the skinny guy in me is very excited for the fat guy in me
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
I'm so high I have morphed into the monopoly man. Or maybe the Pringles guy. I don't know but I have a mustach now
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