So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
