Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
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