I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
Randomize
