Hi
Babe...You're really smothering me right now
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
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