I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
You were upset that she was flirting with your boyfriend so I thought the best game plan was to show her my boobs and get her to make out with me instead. I am the greatest friend on absinthe.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize
