The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
there is absolutely nothing wrong with two grown men staying up all night blowing lines drinking white wine and playing call of duty. don't judge me
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Randomize
