She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
I just realized this morning that my fridge is stocked with coronas, hot dogs, and cheese dip. And I just got waxed. High-five, your best friend is on track to be all kinds of slutty fun this wkd.
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