I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Randomize
