It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
party gras won. party gras always wins.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
you ate dog biscuits in front of my dogs and laughed at them for not have opposable thumbs
What can i say, i'm an artist. I think deep thoughts. In between the homoerotica and pterodactyl noises
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
Randomize
