i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
