me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
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