He disabled his match.com account in front of me
Why did I wake up this morning with 10 tally marks on my hand and a penis drawn on my tits?
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
I just came so hard I growled. Definitely found my gspot.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
When i said i was brazilian i swear to god he started to tear up
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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