saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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