Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
He came so hard he burst a blood vessel in his eye. Do I have to take him to the ER? because I'm too tired for this shit.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Pretty sure I was impersonating Rihanna when I kept asking him what my name was while we were making out
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Nothing like introducing yourself to your high school boyfriend's wife as "the girl who took his virginity"
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Randomize
