Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I literally just told you I found out I masturbate in my sleep. I think we can be snapchat friends again
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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