I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
She said she could kiss it, just not put it in her mouth. Because that would be cheating..
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Hey douche face I just want you to know, if you ever got hit by a bus, I'd really miss you.
Only if you died obviously.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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