i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
Randomize
