YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Last night he asked the cab driver "if you were in the middle of getting tattooed and the tattoo artist suddenly got a boner would you leave or would you get that boner??"
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
Randomize
