in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
And she was only 16?
You say that like it's a bad thing.
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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