my mouth tastes like poor choices
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
