she must wash her vagina with a dirtier vagina
not sure what i find more disconcerting, your text or the fact that i recognized that as a dane cook quote
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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