12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
my goal was to make out with as many people dressed as batman as possible. I have my priorities.
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Come on in and take your pants off
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