its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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