I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize