mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
You should've come with us, we're at Home Depot looking for men.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
Just so you're aware, tomorrow is "Slow Clap when you see Mike" day.
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Randomize
