babies were throwing up all over the place
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Who else will cuddle and watch the Bachelor with me then finger bang me during the rose ceremony
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
