i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
i have the juiciest gold medal in my pants
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
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